***************************
And down in the canyon, the smoke starts to rise
it rides on the wind 'til it reaches your eyes.
When faced with the past, the strongest man cries,
Cries.

Ben Kenobi looked around at the place he would be living for
who-knew-how-long. To a Jedi, home is his own peaceful center of the Force,
but everyone must dwell somewhere. This handful of sand-and-cement rooms was
where he would be staying while he was watching over Luke Skywalker. Sighing,
Ben took out his one vice, his only small defiance of the Jedi Code.

Possession was forbidden; nonetheless he held in his hands a bag of small
objects that rarely left him. He laid them out on the bare table in front of
him and regarded them. A twig, a bit of leather, a metal cylinder, a piece
of duracrete and a rune-carved rock. Useless items; with one exception they
held little intrinsic value. Worthless, really. Ben's eyes blurred as he
regarded them. He reached out a trembling finger to touch the twig.
******************************
Youngling Kenobi sat in the Temple Gardens, attempting to meditate. He was
with his Clan, and he comforted himself with the thought that he wasn't the
worst of them. He could be still, he could empty his mind of thoughts, but
that "peaceful center" Master Yoda kept talking about was still a mystery to
him.

Master Yoda was in front of him now, in fact. It seemed as if he were going
to get some personal attention. "Obi, close your eyes." Master Yoda's voice
was low and soothing. Obi did as he was bid. "Now relax. Empty your mind
of thoughts, you must." Breathing through his impatience, Obi-Wan quickly
complied. He knew he was good at this part. "Now, open your eyes, but look
not." Well, that was confusing, but obiedently Obi-Wan opened his eyes.

"What see you?" Yoda's voice was even more gentle, washing over him instead
of intruding on his calmness. "A tree, Master." Obi replied, trying to
understand how he was supposed to say what he saw but 'look not'.

"And where is the center of the tree Youngling, mmm?"

Obi thought about his reply. It was never a good idea to speak to Master
Yoda without consideration. Still, he couldn't see any other answer. "In the
middle, Master. The thick part."

"Mmmm." Yoda replied, taking a step toward the tree. "No. *Here* is the
center." he said emphatically, pointing to the end of a small branch near his
head. As Obi-Wan stared at it, he had a sudden epiphany. His perceptions
whirled; shifted. He saw the Force in the twig, the way it eddied and flowed
to the trunk, the way the trunk flowed back through it. The center of the
Force was everywhere, and nowhere. Like a wave, or sunlight, the Force had
no boundaries, therefore it could have no center. Each living thing within
the Force was it's own center.

"Yes," Yoda's voice was thick with satisfaction, "See now, you do." He left
Obi-Wan to explore his new perceptions, and find his center.

It was much later that night Obi stole out to the Gardens and snapped off the
twig.
********************************
Padawan Kenobi sat in the large room of the quarters assigned to Master Jinn.
It had been only yesterday Qui-Gon and he had formalized their relationship
as Master and Padawan, and Obi-Wan was still unsure about his welcome. There
were times when he felt the power of the Force swirling around them,
connecting them as if they could read each other's thoughts. But there were
other times when Qui-Gon seemed completely cut off from him, as though
deliberately rejecting the bond.

As if Obi's thoughts had summoned him, Qui-Gon strode into the room, seating
himself on the large chair across from Obi-Wan. Qui-Gon yanked out the
leather tie holding back his hair and tossed it on the table. "Some Counsel
sessions," he said wearily, "are longer than others." Obi-Wan looked at him
sympathetically.

"I've felt that way in some of my lectures." he offered, almost adding the
honorific Master, but still too unsure of his rights. "Can I help you
relax?"

Closing his eyes and exhaling, Master Jinn just nodded once. Obi looked at
him in confusion. When he made his offer, he though Qui-Gon would give him
some idea of what he wanted. He wasn't sure what he should do, but guessed
this was some kind of lesson, or test. Some days it seemed that *everything*
was some kind of test. As Obi rose to move behind Qui-Gon, the larger man
spoke, weariness evident in his voice. "I've cleared out the medidation room
for you. I sent for your things and arranged them while you were in class."

Obi-Wan hid his surprise. He knew that Padawans kept quarters with their
Masters, but he hadn't realized all the details involved. Obviously Qui-Gon
had, and this thoughtfulness on Qui-Gon's part left him feeling a bit better.
He moved around the older man and put his hands on Qui-Gon's temples. Obi
felt him tense, and his heart sank again. As he massaged Qui-Gon's temples,
trying to send soothing, healing thoughts, Obi realized Qui-Gon still wasn't
used to having someone around, being touched, trusting someone fully.

Then Qui-Gon relaxed, opened his eyes and stared straight into Obi's. Even
upside-down they pierced through to his heart, and gave nothing but
acceptance. "Thank you, my Padawan." The Force pulsed, strong and clear, and
Obi-Wan knew beyond all questioning that Qui-Gon wanted him here, that he
would be a true Master. Obi silently pledged to love and respect him, and be
a true Padawan.

Long after Qui-Gon had risen and left the room, Obi picked up his Master's
discarded hair tie.
*******************************
Master Kenobi turned over Anakin's lightsaber, feeling the smoothness of the
metal.
Using the Force to cloak himself from Anakin's notice, he watched the younger
man practice his drills.

Anakin had made himself a new 'saber. Obi-Wan supposed he shouldn't have
been surprised, the boy was always working on something. Their rooms were
littered with mechanical parts, and sometimes Obi thought his Padawan
achieved better meditation when he was "tinkering" than when he sat still.
But the fact Anakin had made a lightsaber without his guidance, without even
his knowledge, troubled Obi-Wan. He watched Anakin practice with his new
'saber. The young man was impressive; muscles under strict control, body
passing through the moves of the drill with smooth grace.

The the Force haloed Anakin, and Obi-Wan felt faint. Visions were rarely
granted him, his connection was stronger in other areas, but in that one
instant Obi saw Anakin as the greatest Jedi who ever lived. Nobility flowed
from the possible-future-Anakin and his fairness and compassion shone from
his aura. Other possible-Anakins shadowed off the edges of reality, but none
so strong as that briefly-glimpsed hero.

Obi released the future-vision into the Force, but with it went his
shielding. Anakin suddenly became aware his Master was in the room. Anakin
turned to Obi-Wan, face shining with excitement.

"Master! I've got a surprise for you. Come see what I've made."

Holding on to the vision of Anakin's potential, Obi-Wan tucked his Padawan's
original lightsaber into his robes.
*****************************
General Kenobi stood on a small rise, unmoving. He stared impassively at the
rubble before him; all that was left of the Jedi Temple. He had not been
here for the destruction of the building, it had been too dangerous for him
on Corusant during the purge. Now the Force drew him here, witness to the
ruins of a symbol. He walked around the desolation, eyes drawn to pick out
familiar areas. Here was where the Counsel rooms had once been, here was the
area where he had shared quarters with Qui-Gon. A forlorn plant still
struggled to bloom, marking the area once filled with quiet lushness; the
Temple Gardens. Dispationately, Obi-Wan turned his back on the green shoot
and moved on.

His feet paused at a small mound of debris. Obi did not need the
confirmation of the Force to know that this was the spot he had parted from
Anakin for the last time. The death of a friendship, the end of love
resonated from here like heat shimmers on a hot desert dune.

Numbly, almost involuntarily, Obi-Wan reached down and picked up a small
piece of duracrete.
******************************
Ben Kenobi held the last of his mementos in his hand, tears streaking his
face. The rune carved in the rock represented his name: Obi-Wan. He had
long suspected Mace knew of his possessions, but the older Jedi had said
nothing. One day Mace had surprised him by handing him the small stone,
saying only: "This is for you. To help you remember who you are." Obi-Wan
felt the Force so strongly at that moment his senses were overwhelmed. His
name shone from the rock and he connected to it with an almost audible sound.
That was the last time he had seen Mace alive.

Releasing his emotions to the Force, he swept his mementos from the table and
moved to the one luxury his hut contained; a beautifuly carved wooden chest.
He opened the lid and placed his souvenirs on top of his Jedi robes. He held
the stone until the last. Briefly, he brought it to his lips. Lightly
brushing its smooth surface, he laid a final kiss upon the past, tossed it
into the trunk, and gently closed the lid.

He was a Jedi. He would always be a Jedi. But he would never again be
Obi-Wan.

And here is a sunrise to set on your sill,
the ghost of the dawn woven here.
To pass through your sorrow and leave you quite still,
sitting among souvenirs.

END