I love you.
Now that's a thing no self-respecting 12-year-old Padawan would say to a girl.
Well, you couldn't really, could you? Not when she was the most beautiful girl in the class. In the Temple. On Corusant. In the Galaxy. In those days, I would have said the entire Universe.
A skinny, dorky kid like me couldn't have said it to her. Here I am a grown man. Twenty-one years old and my stomach still gets the wobbles when I think of Taneal.
Maybe it's because I might be going to see her again. In five minutes or so.
See, we buried a time capsule in the wall of the old Temple. And Master Windu made us promise to come back exactly nine years later. When all the kids would be twenty-one. I feel a bit stupid actually. Probably no one else will turn up. They will have forgotten. I'll be the only idiot there. And I've flown all the way from Corellia.
I turn the speeder into Scanter Road. Soon I'll be at the old Temple. Everthing looks so different. Where did all these office blocks come from?
The old park is gone where we practiced dueling. And the diner where we went once a week for dinner. And the pond where I used to catch frogs when I was really young. It's gone too.
Oh, oh, oh. No. It isn't. It can't be. It must be a mistake. Look what they've done. No, no, no.
The Temple is not there.
There's a dirty big shopping mall. With speeder parks and thousands of speeders, hover cars, and speeder bikes. Holovids. Balloons. Loud Speakers. Turbo Lifts. Security Guards.
They've pulled down the Temple and the trees and the play area for small learners. They've pulled down my dream and built a nightmare.
I park the speeder and wander through the big double doors. Jaws more like it. I ride the Turbo Lift to the top of the Mall and look down at the fountain, far, far below me. There are hundreds of shoppers. People sipping coffee, staring into windows, pushing trolleys, dragging kids, droids carrying parcels.
There is no one digging out a time capsule from a Temple wall. There is no one from grade 7A Jedi Padawan Temple. And even if there were, I probably wouldn't recognise them.
All I have left is memories.
I think back and remember what I wrote when I was twelve. The letter I put in the Time Capsule. The letter that was gone forever. That no one will ever read. The letter I wrote to a girl I'd never see again.
Dear Taneal,
My Master and I are moving to Corellia. So it looks like I'll never see you again. Not till I'm twenty-one anyway. And that's ancient. Anyway, that's how old you will be when you get this letter. If you are there. When they dig up the time capsule I mean.
I will be there for sure.
I feel stupid writing this. But no one will know. If Tyson Jenkins knew, he'd give me heaps. So would his nerdy mates. They pick on me. Just because I have freckles. I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. no I shouldn't say that. That leads to the Dark-Side.
My first day at the Temple was awful. I knew I would cop it. I'm not like you. See, you are the lightsaber dueling champion. You're good at everything. And I'm good at nothing. You get top marks and big compliments from the Masters. They brag about you all the time.
You're good looking - no scrub that. You are better than that. I'll tell you what I think about you. It's all right because no one will read this until the time capsule is opened.
You are gorgeous. If I were a cat, you would be the cream. If I were a dog, you would be the bone. If I were arock, you would be the waterfall running over me.
You are the top and I am the bottom. I'm not good at anything. Except drawing. Master Qui-Gon says I'm good at drawing.
Anyway, I'm getting off track. I want to tell you about my first day at the Temple. There I was, standing out the front, with nowhere to sit. In the end, I had to sit in Master Windu's chair. He said, "You can sit here for the present."
Everyone gawked at me. You were the only one that smiled.
When the bell went I stayed in my seat. Master Windu said, "What are you waiting for, Obi Wan?"
I said, "I'm waiting for the present."
Everyone packed up. They all laughed like mad. Except you. My face was burning, I can tell you that. Talk about embarrassing.
After that my problems just got bigger and bigger. I couldn't get out what I was thinking. When they picked on me I couldn't say a thing.
I would like you to be my friend. But you are popular and I'm not.
You sit at the desk in front of me. Your braided ponytail hangs down and swishes across my Jedi History Books. It is gold like the tail of an angels horse. I would like to touch it, but of course, I never would.
My stomach goes all wobbly when I look at you.
I wanted to give you something. But I didn't have any money. Master Qui-Gon says that Money leads to greed, greed leads to hate etc etc etc. "Make something." he said. "It's the thought that counts. If you want to give her a present, make it yourself."
Well, it was coming up to Easter so I decided to draw on an egg. Seeing how I'm good at drawing and all.
I got an egg and put a little hole at each end and blew the insides out. Then I started painting.
Three weeks. That's how long it took me. I sat up every night until Qui-Gon went crook and made me turn out the light. It was going to be the best egg in the history of the Universe. I painted rabbits. And a Gnome with a fishing rod. Gnomes are little creatures found on the planet of Renki. I also painted a little heart with your initials in it. All covered in flowers.
Qui-Gon thought it was a little ripper. "Obi-Wan," he said. "That is beautiful. It is the best easter egg I've ever seen."
So I wrapped it up in cotton wool and put it in a box.
Then I started to get scared. What if you didn't like it? What if you showed everyone and they laughed? What if you laughed?
Oh geez. I'm scared Taneal. I'm glad you won't get this until you're twenty-one.
It turned out worse than I thought.
As soon as I walked in the classroom door I was in trouble.
Tyson Jenkins grabbed the box. "Look at this!" he yelled. "Obi-Wan has a cute little egg for Taneal. I wonder why?"
All the kids gave me heaps. They really rubbished me.
"Give it back," I whispered. My face burning like an oven.
Tyson Jenkins threw the box on the ground. "This is an egg," he said. " So we'll hatch it." He sat down on the box and clucked like a small creature called a hen. The egg was smashed to bits.
I turned and went for it. I just ran and ran and ran. I didn't care what Master Windu would say to Master Qui-Gon. I didn't care about wagging. I didn't care about anything. Except a present for you.
I ran into the apartment and into the small kitchen and grabbed another egg. There was no time to blow it out. There was no time to paint rabbits and Gnomes and things. I put on some boiling water to hard boil and egg and tipped in some dye.
And that's when it happened. I was angry and rushing about. I slipped over with the saucepan in my hand. The water sloshed all over my cheeks. Oh, the pain. Oh, my face was burning. Oh, it hurt. I'm not a sook, but I screamed and screamed and screamed.
I didn't remember anything else until I woke up in the Jedi Healers Temple.
My face still burned. But I couldn't touch it. I was wearing a mask. Bandages. I looked like a robber. There were little holes for my eyes nose and mouth.
"Your face will be okay." said Master Qui-Gon. "But you have to wear the mask for a long time. Even the Healers can't fix burns as severe as yours."
"I'm not going to Classes like this. No Way."
"You have to." said Master Qui-Gon. "You have to wear the mask for about six months while your face heals the natural way."
So I walk into the Classroom late. Looking like a Burglar. With my mask on.
No one laughed.
Because someone else was just like me.
You.
Not burned. But just sitting there with a mask around your face.
Where did you get it? I don't know. And you kept wearing it for weeks.
And I have never said Thank you. And tomorrow Master Qui-Gon and I are moving to Corellia. I just want you to know that I... No, I just can't get it out.
Yours scincerly... No, scrub that.
Yours with thanks... No, scrub that
Aw, what the heck...
Love,
Obi-Wan
Well, that's what I wrote, all those year ago. Something like that anyway. And here I am exactly nine years later. In a Shopping Mall. The Temple is gone. There is no Master Windu and his grown-up class here to open up the time capsule.
There is just me and a million shoppers. I can't even tell where the Temple was. It would take half-an-hour to walk form one end of the Mall to another.
My face healed up long ago. I don't even have any scars. I should feel happy but the Temple has been knocked down. There is no time capsule with my letter in it. I guess builder droids must have uncovered it. Or, it could be still buried deep under the shops and fountains and speeder parks. Maybe some of the letters inside were sent to the kids. Who knows? No one would have been able to contact me half way across the galaxy.
One of the other kids might be here in the Shopping Mall. Maybe, like me, they didn't know the Temple had been knocked down. I would never recognise them. Not after all these years. Not after we have all grown up.
I make my way sadly through the happy shoppers. I don't notice the shouting and jostling and laughing. I reach the door.
And for a moment, my heart misses a beat.
For standing there, I see something that makes me go back in time. Silently, standing by the door is a person wearing a burns bandage on her face. Children are staring at her.
They shouldn't do that. Neither should I. But my heart is beating fast and I don't know what I am doing. The woman's eyes meet mine and she slowly starts to take off the bandage. The children gasp. And so do I as her hair falls behind her like the tail of an angels horse.
And for a moment, I am twelve again. I catch my breath. My stomach wobbles.
I stare at the woman in front of me.
I know that the rest of my life is going to be happy. Because she is wearing the biggest smile on her face.
And so am I.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Obi Wan